I love fashion, you love fashion, they love fashion, in fact who doesn’t love fashion? And if you are born to be a spoilsport thereby waving your arm up in the air, signalling your disinterest in fashion, then what’s that you are wearing? CLOTHES.Doh! Yes, clothes! But who decided that you would be wearing what you are wearing right now? You, right? You picked them up because you have a style sense (or a lack of it, that’s for others to decide). But your decision involves clothes which maybe either spanking, dowdy or so-so. So this signifies how clothes and civilization are two inseparable entities. In fact, in this day and age the lack of attire would paint one to be an alien to the concept of civilization (save the sociological and psychological talks for another day).
But due to the erratic nature of human race and equally erratic nature of fashion, they make a combustible combination at times. There have been trends over the years which should not have picked up momentum in the first place. But they came, rocked our world, was considered to be rad and in trend, but was downright distasteful and in retrospect makes you cringe. Here’s a look at disastrous fashion trends we all followed (or, others followed) which would give the generation to approach a good laughing time.
15. Baggy Saggy Pants
Those which made sure your underpants covered derrière was out for the world to see. Some swore by it, some snickered at it, but we all lived with this disastrous trend. Bad news, they are still around (relatively decent than its yesteryear version).
Trivia: For all you enthusiast of this trend, this is originally a jail trend where inmates purposefully sag their pants to signal their availability for sex. Still sporting one of these?
14. Mom Pants
Also known as high-waist jeans. They claimed to accentuate a tiny waist and a pert behind, unfortunately instead of accentuating it ended up portraying a bloated bottom. It rode right up around an individual’s mid-section, giving an overall cringe worthy impression. Good news, they are still around! Sleeker, chicer without riding up that high.
13. Bandanna & Hats
I love hats. I love bandannas. But, hats and bandannas together? Uh! Well, it may look good if the bandanna is discretely tucked inside the hat, instead of peeking out at the side. Still cannot visualize the image that I’m drawing? Think 50cent. The half bandanna gives an impression of a skull injury wrapped up nice and tight. I know it is a rapper dress code, but hey! Don’t say I didn’t say a thing about losing hair with that bandanna and hat glued to you head right throughout the day.
12. Shoulder Pads
The trend followed by almost all the leading ladies. The padded shoulder gave an impression of broad and less sloping shoulders. Margaret Thatcher, Princess Diana, every fashion forward woman wore it. But why in the world a woman would want to look like an American Football player? Mull it over.
11. The Mullet
Anything which makes look Hugh Jackman ghastly is got to be a fashion disaster (catch him in Chappie). If you’ve never clapped your eyes on anything with this hair cut, then you should be thanking your stars. It is a joke of sorts people love playing on themselves. Imagine short hair over the forehead which the barber forgot to snip at the nape. It’s an attempt to womanize men. Steer clear of this trend!
10. Crop tops or shirts
Hold your horses; I have nothing against a crop top. I love it, the toned midriff that it bares, the smooth skin that waves your way; it’s flaunted by goddesses, what’s not to like? This one thing! Men donning it. It’s only the prerogative of a female to steal things from her man’s wardrobe and it should never be the other way ‘round. As it results in disasters such as these. Imagine Prince and Alex Winter.
9. Undies as outerwear
It all starts with superheroes (or, heroines). They save the world, people cheer and the next thing you know the masses are dressing like their favourite superhero. This trend is quite popular amongst the ladies. It seems off late everybody has been taking cues from Wonder Woman. Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera; everybody is flaunting their undies in public, not in music videos but on red carpets as well. Somebody get their mommas! These ladies forgot their dress at home.
8. Hobble skirt
Is designed to make one hop. So if you are a rabbit, you would definitely love this trend. And it’s nothing like a pencil skirt. It practically impedes the wearers stride. The initial idea was the tighter, the better. It is slimfitting all the way from the top (waist) to the bottom with NO SLIT at the side.
No, not the ones fixed on your windows. This one is the ones attached to one’s teeth. Portrayed to be cool by rappers (of course!) these are cosmetic teeth disapproved by dentists as well. All in the name of fashion.
6. Backwards clothing
Yes, this is exactly what it sounds like! You knowingly wear your clothes front-side-back. And why would one do that? Well, to look cool, of course. Thankfully, the ghastly trend is not around these days.
5. The EMO
Respecting your decision to look like a bedraggled and starving street rat, I pronounce you to have the wackiest style sense ever. You thought goth to be so cool that you embraced an advanced version of it. The flicks plastered to the side of the face, the kohl rimmed eyes, the ridiculously tight jeans and the checkered shoes, the entire get up is all is horrid. Wait till your kids are born, you’ll perpetually have that foot in your mouth!
4. Foot binding
People should be hanged to death for coming up with these horrible fashion ideas. In the olden days the Chinese women were considered to be ill-fitted for marriage with normal feet (talk about foot fetish). Thus, the idea of foot binding. Traditionally, a little girl’s feet were socked in a bath of urine and vinegar and then all the toes except the big one were folded tightly under the foot to be later tightly tied with a bandage. The bandage would be so tight that the girl’s bone would snap in the process of growing thereby being only three inches long. These distorted feet were called lotus feet.
3. Parachute Pants
Quite a trendy outfit back in those days. Parachute pants teamed with jackets shrieked disaster. Nylon pants with innumerable pockets, these are gone for good.
2. Spandex bodysuits
We all love metal (that’s me over-generalizing). You may be one of those fanatics who know every Led Zeppelin number by heart. But do you worship their outfit as well? SPANDEX…grrrr! BODYSUIT…grrrgrrr! How can any living thing wear that thing in the stifling heat or chattering cold or drenching rain? It’s suitable only to be worn in space.
1. Heelless shoes
Leave it to a woman to take uncomfortable to soaring new heights. In the name of fashion we’ve been accused of murdering our fellow ladies. And each time I’ve vehemently protested against these scathing allegations, but this time they are true! These are shoes without heels. You’ll be wobbling around unlike a ballerina (due to the lack of practice) in these.